just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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