If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
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