I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
