Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
