My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
