Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
