margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
