It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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