She went from zero to smokin in five shots
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
