I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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