oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
i will never coherently bang her
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Randomize
