That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
