dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
