Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
why is half of my head shaved?
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