There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
