is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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