Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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