direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
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