He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
