we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
