i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Randomize
