We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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