Grow some girl-balls and come out already
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
