dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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