fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
