walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Randomize
