just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize