I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
