i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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