had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
