If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
