Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Randomize
