I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize