Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
