i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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