I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
