I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
