Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
