Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
