I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Randomize
