So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
