Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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