I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
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