Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize