just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
