there was a trapeze. enough said
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Randomize
