I'm eating all of the evidence.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
