i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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