no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
