Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
